Difficult decisions

I wrote the other day about struggling with a decision to have surgery. Needless to say it’s never an easy decision for anyone to have surgery. I do not take these things lightly.

I don’t want surgery.

I NEED surgery. A very different thing.

Then there is the added struggle of being a teacher. We are…

the ones who drag ourselves to work when we are sick.

the ones who leave our children with our spouses or others so we can ‘not miss a day’.

the ones spend hours of our nights and weekends working.

All… for the love of the job. And I do love my job.

But…
I also love walking. I love moving without pain. I love a life without struggle. I love walking up the hallway to take my students to specials and visit with friends. I love participating in the teacher-student basketball and volleyball games. I love bopping around my room checking in with kids. I love sitting on the floor with them.

However, for the past 18 months, I have not been able to do much of what I love. I have missed important events with my family. I have missed walks with my dog and friends. I have sat by watching everyone ‘do’ while I ‘do not’.

And I’m done. Some may say…

perhaps I could wait until the end of June.

perhaps it isn’t necessary.

perhaps I should seek another opinion in addition to the three I have already been given.

perhaps I should wait so I won’t miss out on all of the big events for my students this spring.

I know and understand all of that. And if I could do both, I would.

But I can’t. And I need to take care of me right now. So I can be my BEST self in August when a new year begins and a new group of students belong to me for 180 days. I hope that these students will forgive me for missing 30 of their days.

5 thoughts on “Difficult decisions”

  1. There are times when we must do what is best for us. Sounds like that is the direction you are taking. Think about August and how much more you can give your students then. Good luck!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. These decisions are always hard, but you’ve obviously thought this one through. You have to take care of you first. I think as teachers we struggle with this a bit, but it really is best if we put ourselves first. In this case, it sounds like you need to do just that. Take care of yourself. It hasn’t been an easy decision, but one well thought out.

    Like

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